Wednesday, July 1, 2015

Being a fan sucks

The Royals overall are a good team. The Royals of the last 2 nights are an absolute stinking pile of garbage. Granted, the team is banged up and have had several starters reach the disabled list, but the last two nights have made me question why I am a fan, in particular due to how miserable the games have been. In fact, I have been to many miserable games in my life and I have no idea why I continue to follow my favorite teams. Below are some terrible games I have attended in my lifetime, starting with the past two nights:

Royals vs Astros - June 29/30, 2015: On Monday, the Royals lost 6-1 after Joe Blanton dropped a giant fart in Minute Maid Park. On Tuesday, I was not even able to reach the stadium because Tropical Storm That Came Without A Warning And Thus Was Not Named blew through town and made it impossible to get to the stadium because there was several feet of water on the roads. My wife and I sat on the Houston metro rail for about 2 hours while flooding occurred and delayed trains from transporting people across town, before they finally shut down the rail system altogether. The Royals subsequently laid another fart, losing 4-0. They scored a total of 1 run in 2 games. Terrible. Below is what downtown Houston looked like last night as we were trying to slog our way to the stadium on foot:
Chiefs vs Chargers – October 25, 2009: I was randomly in KC this weekend while attending the K-State Homecoming game and decided to check out the Chiefs on my way back to the University of Iowa where I was a graduate student at the time. (Side story: my friend Ben was with me and he had never been to an NFL game before. We did not have money for a ticket but we did have several Iowa State Bud Light fan cans which were red and gold and we were able to trade some of those beers for a pair of tickets. It was 2009 and the Chiefs were awful). The weather was cold and gray and Matt Cassel was the quarterback. The score was 20-0 at halftime and the Chiefs managed only one score the entire game. Super giant fart. Final score: 37-7. Thank gosh I did not pay for tickets.

Pittsburgh Penguins vs Dallas Stars - January 25, 2014: I had been a lifelong Penguins fan but never saw them live in person until this late weekend in January. They visited Dallas, which was only a 5 hour drive from Lubbock, TX where I was living at the time. I made the trek, super excited the whole drive. When I arrived at the stadium, I was overjoyed at seeing NHL stars Sidney Crosby and Evgeni Malkin skating around the ice during warm ups. That excitement quickly turned to disgust as the Penguins played like a JV high school team, allowing a former Penguin to score the first goal against them, and they lost 3-0. THEY COULD NOT EVEN MANAGE TO SCORE ONE GOAL THE FIRST TIME I SAW THEM IN PERSON?!?!?! Why am I a fan?!?!? ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. At least I got a picture with 2 penguins:
Sporting KC vs DC United - August 23, 2014: I have always loved the KC Wizards/Sporting KC, even when they were really awful and had to play in the T-Bones outfield. When Sporting KC re-branded and built their new stadium, I could not wait to attend a game. The first game I attended was a 0-0 draw with Houston, but it was still exciting because it seemed like the first team to score would win. The second game I attended was after my bachelor party in August 2014 before I made my way back to my future wife in Texas. We had scored some nice seats in the Sporting Members Club (amazing section, by the way). The stadium was full, excitement was in the air, the Cauldron was shaking and the team was playing DC United a longtime rival, then Sporting laid a dud, losing 3-0. WHO GIVES UP 3 GOALS IN A SOCCER MATCH AND WHY CAN’T SPORTING SCORE A SINGLE GOAL WHEN I AM PRESENT? Blahhhh I should stop attending games.

K-State Wildcats vs Texas A&M, Big 12 Championship football game – December 5, 1998: K-State was ranked #1 or #2 in most polls at the time, and a win in the Big 12 Championship game would basically guarantee them a spot in the National Title game. My dad drove my uncle, my sister and me to St. Louis for this game. K-State was winning 27-12 in the 4th quarter before breaking the heart of every single Wildcat fan ever and losing 36-33 in double overtime. The drive home was the second worst moment of my life, behind only the night that my dad passed away. I don’t think I ever want to attend another game of any kind ever.

Royals vs Orioles - May 11, 2008: The Royals were set to play the Orioles on Mother’s Day in 2008, and they were even going to hand out umbrellas courtesy of Budweiser. I was about to graduate from K-State at the time and had come home to celebrate with my family and watch the Royals. Who am I kidding, we were going for the free umbrellas because the Royals sucked. For this game, my brother and I bought a small grill and some hot dogs so we could tailgate but when we arrived at the stadium, it was chilly and gray, with a slight drizzle. We did not realize that we needed a full set of tools to assemble the grill and thus were not able to cook up the hot dogs or even light a fire to warm up. My mom wanted to make sure we got the umbrellas so we went inside the game early and took our seats in the nosebleeds but the drizzle turned into rain and the game was delayed for an hour. By the time they tried to start the game up, the rain came again and we decided to leave, having consumed zero hot dogs and watched zero baseball. The game was delayed in total for 3 hours and even though the Royals eventually won 4-0, it was a complete waste of time to go. 

There are plenty of other examples of crappy games I have attended, so you can understand why I am so bitter about the last two nights. I can only hope Edinson Volquez turns it up tonight and I witness a perfect game to make up for the garbage I have endured in the past.