A Royal flush

Yesterday, the Kansas City Royals completed a season-long stink fest against crappy MLB teams by flushing their playoff chances down the toilet after losing to the last-place Red Sox. There is plenty of blame to go around: Ned Yost for his stubborn refusal to use his best relievers in a close game, Aaron Crow for pitching like it was batting practice, Mike Moustakas who not only cannot hit but cannot field anything either, etc. 

As a lifelong Royals fan, this one stings a lot. I was 3 years old when the Royals won the 1985 World Series and therefore I have not seen them in the playoffs for basically my entire life. I certainly feel like what was becoming a promising season has been reduced to a steaming pile of poo. I have never really hated on Ned Yost, but I wish I could flush him down the toilet right now:

I really don’t understand why, with their slim playoff chances slipping away, the Royals cannot find a way to step their game up. Since I am not a professional athlete, I have no idea if that is even possible, but what I do know is that the Royals can stop swinging at sh*tty pitches outside the strike zone, they can stop using Nori Aoki as the designated hitter (seriously, who puts their LEAST powerful hitter as the DH?!?!?!?!?!), they can stop bunting every time someone gets on base, and they can start trying harder against the worst teams in the league. It is so frustrating to beat the Oakland A’s, but lose to the Red Sox. Idiots.

Ironically, the Sports Illustrated jinx might have something to do with the slide. Since they were featured on the cover of the magazine, they have barely hovered at .500, with an overall record of 9-10 since August 25. Even KCTV5 pondered if the jinx would affect the Royals’ playoff chances... Dear SI, stop putting KC on the cover of your sh*tty magazine. We hate you.

The Royals have 14 games left, all of them against AL Central opponents. If they do not change something, and soon, it is very feasible that the Cleveland Indians (who currently sit 6.5 games behind Detroit in third place) could pass them in the standings. The Indians are a sh*tty team, but wouldn't that be a fitting end to a sh*tty season by the Kansas Sh*tty Royals. Sorry for cursing.