Acronyms of destiny

In case you missed last night’s World Series game, below is a synopsis of what occurred:

Innings 1-5:

Score = 2-2. Game = tight. Royals bats = missing.

Innings 6-9:

Score = 7-2. Game = AMAZING. Royals bats = powerful and explosive and clutch and caused the Giants to become racists.

What a fun night. I have truly enjoyed this Royals season, and especially the postseason as there have been COUNTLESS stories of love and devotion and faith and kindness emanating from Kansas City. For example, Wade Davis’ wife left a waiter World Series tickets as a tip. The Royals have adopted several cancer patients and given them a chance to see the World Series. And the Royals have made it possible to bring back super-fan Sung Woo to America. Has there ever been another city with that much love and respect and awesomeness?!? My wife and I are so jealous of everyone who gets to experience Kansas City every day during this Glorious October.

Last night, while watching the Royals shutdown trio of relievers, I realized something. All of the Royals players’ names stand for something awesome, and I decided to share what their names mean with you:

Alcides "Esky" Escobar: what a stud at Short Stop

Alex Gordon is not doing much this series, but teams are afraid to run on him. And he catches everything hit his way

I pity the fool who tries to hit a Greg Holland slider.

Jacobim Mugatu: "That Kelvin is so hot right now."

Wade Davis does not allow hits. Nor does he allow walks. You cannot hit his pitches no matter how hard you try so just give it up.

Omar's home run last night was one of the most beautiful hits I have ever seen. Gone as soon as it left the bat.

This is what I imagine Ned Yost thinks about in the dugout...

Aren’t these great? Acronyms of destiny! Let’s get them in San Francisco!